I usually do not fall victim to carelessly spending money on purely season specific merchandise - for instance dishes that you would use ONLY at Christmas/Halloween/Thanksgiving/Flag Day time. However this Fall, there are few items that require lots of bandwagons, followed by lots of jumping on aforementioned bandwagons:
Candy Corn Pumpkins
Probably the closest thing to heaven. If Baby Jesus were able to endorse products he'd be all over these. See! There they are. In all their deliciousness, coated in a layer of delicious *sigh*. These,
I'll have you know, are one of the main reasons why I look forward to going to work each day lately. OMG! I can't wait for tomorrow!
Fall-ish flavored Beer.
How delicious are these, guys? I look forward to colder months so that it's socially acceptable to drink darker ales.
New Castle
always has appeal. Because it's my
FAVORITE. Ever. But New Castle in October/November/December is damn near perfect. Sam Adams has a full suite of Fall brews that are just as good as the next.
Especially if you drink one of each all in one night, and then you can't really remember if they were good or bad, you just remember them not being Natty Light, and you smile to yourself. And
then you remember that you're not in a Frat House that seems to never have toilet paper,
ANYWHERE. And you smile even bigger.
Hooker Boots.
Yep. These are the essence of Fall and look great with skirts that fall to the knee or below
or mini skirts if you're a whore.
Or dressed as a whore for Halloween ;) Not to mention they are surprisingly comfy. Try some on next time you're at DSW. I think you'll become a fan too. And ladies, you have to admit, we
all have a lil, tiny, bit of whore in us somewhere that needs to get out every now and again. These are the perfect way to let her get out and
mingle without running the risk of contracting something or getting yourself preggers.
Pumpkins. 
Make great, inexpensive center pieces and just scream
FALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL! Not to mention they serve other purposes as well. Such as: being super good for you, cooking up the seeds and munching on them, and providing endless hours of entertainment for people who enjoy weilding knives and have a steady hand. Personally, I love how they look on people's front stoops. You can always tell how many people are in the family by how many pumpkins are on the stairs. And you can always tell the pumpkin that the lil kids picked out. 9 times outta 10 they are all banged up and mangey lookin. Classic.
Corn Mazes.
Who wouldda thunk that these could provide such entertainment... For adults. I think in our old age we
love to solve
things. I know I single handedly feel as though I can solve all the world crisis'; which has
nothing to do with my being
stubborn and everything to do with my being
right :) Which is why corn mazes are so great when you go with kids. Since we are older and therefore
wiser they have to follow
us. If not for the
sole purpose that fun can turn to
panic in 5 seconds, when they get lost in the corn maze and have some
interaction with the
scarecrow. Back to the point, they have to listen to you and you are always right. Your way is always the right way when it comes to the corn maze, even if you are wrong. They'll just think you "got really lucky" and "get to try it out again"...Yay!
Probably the closest thing to heaven. If Baby Jesus were able to endorse products he'd be all over these. See! There they are. In all their deliciousness, coated in a layer of delicious *sigh*. These, I'll have you know, are one of the main reasons why I look forward to going to work each day lately. OMG! I can't wait for tomorrow!
Fall-ish flavored Beer.
How delicious are these, guys? I look forward to colder months so that it's socially acceptable to drink darker ales. 
New Castle always has appeal. Because it's my FAVORITE. Ever. But New Castle in October/November/December is damn near perfect. Sam Adams has a full suite of Fall brews that are just as good as the next. 
Especially if you drink one of each all in one night, and then you can't really remember if they were good or bad, you just remember them not being Natty Light, and you smile to yourself. And then you remember that you're not in a Frat House that seems to never have toilet paper, ANYWHERE. And you smile even bigger.
Hooker Boots.
Yep. These are the essence of Fall and look great with skirts that fall to the knee or below or mini skirts if you're a whore. Or dressed as a whore for Halloween ;) Not to mention they are surprisingly comfy. Try some on next time you're at DSW. I think you'll become a fan too. And ladies, you have to admit, we all have a lil, tiny, bit of whore in us somewhere that needs to get out every now and again. These are the perfect way to let her get out and mingle without running the risk of contracting something or getting yourself preggers.
Pumpkins. 
Make great, inexpensive center pieces and just scream FALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL! Not to mention they serve other purposes as well. Such as: being super good for you, cooking up the seeds and munching on them, and providing endless hours of entertainment for people who enjoy weilding knives and have a steady hand. Personally, I love how they look on people's front stoops. You can always tell how many people are in the family by how many pumpkins are on the stairs. And you can always tell the pumpkin that the lil kids picked out. 9 times outta 10 they are all banged up and mangey lookin. Classic.
Corn Mazes.
Who wouldda thunk that these could provide such entertainment... For adults. I think in our old age we love to solve things. I know I single handedly feel as though I can solve all the world crisis'; which has nothing to do with my being stubborn and everything to do with my being right :) Which is why corn mazes are so great when you go with kids. Since we are older and therefore wiser they have to follow us. If not for the sole purpose that fun can turn to panic in 5 seconds, when they get lost in the corn maze and have some interaction with the scarecrow. Back to the point, they have to listen to you and you are always right. Your way is always the right way when it comes to the corn maze, even if you are wrong. They'll just think you "got really lucky" and "get to try it out again"...Yay!
1 comment:
I gave away my hooker boots just last month. Because I am OLD and I can't do such high heels anymore. :( No more hooker boots for me!
But I'm all about everything else! I think tomorrow will be my pumpkin-getting day. :)
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