Snow!

Last weekend we had a snow storm ... we got about 5 inches. While it was beautiful, I've already had my fill and hope that we don't get anymore this year. 

Lovie had a great time though:

Such a little snow bunny ... Thank you Miss Maria for my panda bear hat!

Happy 6 months Baby Sister!

I remember as a kid during the summer, thinking about Christmas and it seemed so. far. away. Almost elusive. Now, heavens to Betsy, a year is over in the blink of an eye.

Further highlighting this contrast between childhood and adulthood, is that a mere 6 months ago I was in labor for 14 hours with Baby Sister. Where, how, when did that happen??? At just six months, she is already so smart and LOVES her Big Brother, Lovie. I can tell she's going to have a zest for life and a love of food. And I have the honor, no matter how bad the day may be, to get to look at this little, happy face and call her my own ...

And to think ... this outfit was the slimming option  :) 

Happy Half-Birthday, Little Love Girl!!

Product Review: Greatest Eyeliner Ever

I have really small, squinty eyes; so squinty that if I wear mascara or eyeliner on my bottom lashes I look like a meth addict.  Therefore, all my life I've shy-ed away from looking like a meth addict. I've always used mascara but have been too afraid to use eyeliner.

Then I decided to go and get married and that required impeccable makeup and anything to make my eyes look bigger. The fine ladies at Lancome agreed that I should shy away from mascara on my lower lashes and eyeliner on the lower lashes but to line the tops with a waterproof eyeliner in brown. It was great, did the trick perfectly but it was a little impossible to get off great for wedding day not so great for everyday.

Then, last weekend I went to visit my dear friend and BFF Maria. She needed to go to Clinique to get some eyeliner so I joined. We both walked out of there with this:

I had to get two: Intense Ivy and Intense Midnight

Did you happen to take a look at the cost comparison between the Lancome pencil and the Clinique? For the price of ONE Lancome pencil I was able to get TWO Clinique pencils okay, okay, approximately. And it stays on all day ... and it's not waterproof ... and it's amazing. Did I mention it has a little bit of shimmer? Love shimmer.

Historically, I am not a fan of Clinique. I know they claim to be sensitive skin friendly, but my skin is even too sensitive for their level of sensitivity. I was a Prescriptives gal. But we all know what happened to them ... womp womp. But this passed the itchy, runny eyes sensitivity test. And let me tell you, an Intense Midnight pencil on your lids will wake those tired eyes right up.

I'm in love, and I will never use another eyeliner ever again.

Depression? Postpartum? SAD?

I just want to feel like myself again and less like this:

There are some major things that have happened (fairly) recently, that may be contributing factors to this. I'll go in sequential order: 

1. Got married (late 2010)
2. Got pregnant (December 2010)
3. Stopped working (August 2011)
4. Had Baby (August 2011)
5. Full time Mom (late 2011/early 2012)
6. ???? 

I know. None of those things are sad things, they are happy things. However, as any newly wed knows, there are major adjustments that happen upon starting a marriage. A lot of people think that if you live together before-hand that then when you're married it's the same. But it's not. There are certain changes that take place that take adjusting to - both good and bad. So, yes it's happy but a happy marriage takes a lot of hard work. Then with pregnancy the hormones and just being pregnant overall make it more uncomfortable/borderline miserable than enjoyable. I'd even go so far to say that the only enjoyable things about pregnancy are feeling the baby move, seeing the baby on a sonogram, and having bigger boobs. Then the baby coming makes for a very sleep-deprived and over-stressed/over-worked/over-everything lifestyle. Then being a full time Mom is alienating. It's been so hard. By far the hardest, loneliest thing ever.  

Since I don't have a circle of friends where we all started out with one child the same age so then we decide to have our second around the same time too, I don't always have a network of friends that I can call on for a play date/Mommy date. I do have a lovely circle of friends and I am grateful and thankful for them, we just aren't all at the same stage in our lives. 

I realize a lot of the reason why I don't have a network of girlfriends with kids is because up until this year I was working full-time ... and the last thing I wanted to do most weekends was send Lovie off for a play date. Due in large part to me enjoying having him around, missing him and he was having non-stop play time (all day 5 days a week) at daycare. I am also well aware that now, I can't always do playdates because of Lovie's preschool schedule and the fact that Baby Sister is so young and still so needy read: breastfeeding. 

So, I'm trying to keep a very realistic, very honest rationale for the reason for my depression/sadness and realize a lot of why I am this way is situational. And the Type A in me puts a plan into place called How I Can Fix It ... so Chapter 1 in How I Can Fix It is take steps to form/foster relationships with women who have kids approximately the same age as mine, which can be achieved by: 

1. Taking Mom's up on their offer to "get the kids together one afternoon"
2. Asking Mom's on Facebook for playdates
3. Joining a MOTTS group at Lovie's preschool (MOTTS = Mom's of Tots to Teens)
4. Becoming more involved at church
5. Keeping an ear out for other social activities

When I do have more flexibility to be more of a social butterfly with my children, I want to have a network to turn to. Also, depending on what we have going on each day, Baby Sister and Lovie can have very flexible schedules. That's why if a fellow Mom asks for a playdate, unless we have a doctors appointment or SOMEthing going on I won't decline. 

Also, part of Chapter 1 includes going to talk to someone. A therapist. Regardless of what it is, it's now my job to be the best, most productive Mom and wife (whether I was working or not). And that's what I am trying to be on a daily basis. Which may mean going back to work ... I'm not too proud or guilty to admit that I may be a working Mom ... hey if means I'm happy then that directly translates into a happy home/kids/husband. I just don't know, I do know I can't solve this problem on my own so I am going to therapy. A lot of this requires time and still adjusting to new schedules, routines ... Regardless, I'll keep you all posted on my progress and how things are going.

Motherhood is a struggle that's for sure. And that's something no one really does ever prepare you for.

Valentine's Day

OH goodie!! A totally made-up Holiday ... actually it's such a horrible holiday it doesn't even deserve to be capitalized.

Yes, I have a Valentine and yes, I still hate Valentine's Day.

That being said, and because the day is just so stupid, I thought:
Wouldn't it be nice to get each other a present???

So, we got each other something special.

All Mr. Nonmomjeans could talk about was how much he wanted a cast iron skillet. I'm pretty sure he even put that in his Match.com profile. We just don't seem to carry them here in Virginia, oddly enough. So in a magazine I was reading, it just so happened that an editor loved hers from Lodge Cast Iron Cookware and it comes preseasoned! Valentine's gift problem solved. Mr. Nonmomjeans also has delicate hands that are sensitive to heat so I thought it'd also be nice if I got him a handle protector for his precious phalanges.

I've never had a massage or a spa day. So I was pretty excited to see this:

Let's just say this overworked Momma is really looking forward to that little treat.

The icing on the cake was Lovie and Baby Sister's red roses and the sweet card they both signed.

The penmanship alone is enough to make any Mother proud.

But I still hate Valentine's Day.

August 24

Yep! That's Baby Sister's birthday! It's also a remarkably special day in another way too ... she shares her birthday with my cousin Kristin, her birthday angel. Kristin's life was tragically taken at the age of 21 by her boyfriend just a few weeks after she graduated from college. However, her spirit lives on in the lives of those who loved her and now, Baby Sister too.

It's my mission to make sure Baby Sister truly appreciates how special it is that she shares her birthday with Kristin. Ever since Kristin's Krusade was founded, and the 5K was established held each year at Kristin's alma mater St. Joe's in Philadelphia the whole Duni family has participated. It's important for family to be there for one another. Even though Baby Sister was barely 2 months old we went to Kristin's Krusade last year. The only one we missed was 2010 and that was because that year Kristin's Krusade was on the day that Mr. NonMomJeans and I got married.

Growing up Kristin's nickname was affectionately Special K (what foreshadowing, right?!?!). When I was pregnant with Matthew, before I moved back to Richmond with my family, I visited Kristin's grave. I wanted her to meet Matthew and honestly, I didn't know when I'd get a chance to visit her again. On the way out to visit her I stopped at a 7-11 and got one of these bars, wrote a little message on it and left at her grave. Now look who is a now a sponsor of Kristin's Krusade:

This made me smile and cry at the same time.

I've always enjoyed participating in running races. Never really to beat my time or because I'm super competitive but because it gives me the same adrenaline rush as a roller coaster does before you go down the first big drop. Kristin's Krusade is hands down my favorite race and one that I will participate in for as long as I am able to move my legs. Our angel works her magic every year, as there has never been a rainy day for Kristin's Krusade. Talk about some "pull" up there in heaven. Here are some pictures from last year's race:

The words "Kristin's Krusade" is Kristin's handwriting

Baby Sister participating her first of many Kristin's Krusades's at 7 weeks old 

My family at Kristin's Krusade, can't wait for the beautiful day we're going to have this year!

Take a few moments to learn more about Kristin's Krusade - video taken from Kristin's Krusade 2011

Perfect

I think the American Dream as far as kids is concerned is two - a boy and a girl. This is affirmed on a daily basis. If I'm out with Baby Sister while Lovie is in preschool, I get a lot of: "Oh how old is she?" or "What a cute baby" followed by: "Is this your only one?" or "Does she have any siblings?" When I mention that she has an older brother who is four and a half I ALWAYS get this response: "How perfect! A boy and a girl! Now you can stop!" Or "How perfect! One of each!" To which I always say, "Yes, we are blessed, but we still would like to have one more."

And it's true. We are blessed. Both kids are happy and healthy and cute and thriving. But a.) having a boy and a girl, at least to me, isn't perfect (I'll explain) and b.) just cause we have one of each doesn't mean that we shouldn't/don't want one more. 

To me, perfect is two boys, even three boys. That's right. No girls. Why? Well, it kinda sucks being a girl. You have a period. (I could literally stop right there.) And atrocious mood swings and other girls are vicious in middle school and going to any sort of dressy-function is a nightmare ... because let's face it - we dress for other women not for our husbands. Girls are bitchy. If you don't look/dress/comb your hair a certain way you may not have friends. Barbies are expensive (to be fair so are Thomas the Tank Engine trains). So, there's a lot of crap that goes in to being a girl. A lot of high maintenance. A lot of mood. And then one day, if you're "lucky" you get to push a watermelon out of your hoo-ha and see your body go through a real-live science experiment. Neat. 

So, you may be calling Child Protective Services right now, because I have a little girl and just a paragraph above mentioned I want all boys. I love Baby Sister and wouldn't trade her for anything. And I love her with my whole heart and soul. She is perfect. It's just, my idea of perfect is different from the "norm." We do want to have one more, and yes, I hope it's a boy.

I still stand by the statement that I have made all-along since I found out that she was a girl: 

I'm not looking forward to her starting puberty cause there is nothing "happy" about a period. 

Period.